Skip to main content

Misery and Company

Sympathy in Everyday Life

In a kind of social tour of sympathy, Candace Clark reveals that the emotional experience we call sympathy has a history, logic, and life of its own. Although sympathy may seem to be a natural, reflexive reaction, people are not born knowing when, for whom, and in what circumstances sympathy is appropriate. Rather, they learn elaborate, highly specific rules—different rules for men than for women—that guide when to feel or display sympathy, when to claim it, and how to accept it. Using extensive interviews, cultural artifacts, and "intensive eavesdropping" in public places, such as hospitals and funeral parlors, as well as analyzing charity appeals, blues lyrics, greeting cards, novels, and media reports, Clark shows that we learn culturally prescribed rules that govern our expression of sympathy.

"Clark’s . . . research methods [are] inventive and her glimpses of U.S. life revealing. . . . And you have to love a social scientist so respectful of Miss Manners."—Clifford Orwin, Toronto Globe and Mail

"Clark offers a thought-provoking and quite interesting etiquette of sympathy according to which we ought to act in order to preserve the sympathy credits we can call on in time of need."—Virginia Quarterly Review

323 pages | 2 line drawings, 11 tables | 6 x 9 | © 1997

Sociology: General Sociology

Table of Contents

1: The Social Character of Sympathy
2: Sympathy Giving: Forms and Process
3: Framing Events as Bad Luck: Sympathy Entrepreneurs and the Grounds for Sympathy
4: The Socioemotional Economy, Social Value, and Sympathy Margin
5: Sympathy Biography and the Rules of Sympathy Etiquette
6: Interpreting Deviance: The Sympathetic Response
7: Sympathy, Microhierarchy, and Micropolitics
8: Epilogue
Appendix: Research Strategies
Name Index
Subject Index

Be the first to know

Get the latest updates on new releases, special offers, and media highlights when you subscribe to our email lists!

Sign up here for updates about the Press